Should i spank my kids




















Properly understood and administered, spanking is most effective as a deterrent to undesirable behavior for younger preschoolers but never for infants. As children age, spanking should become even less frequent as other types of consequences are utilized. Spanking should be phased out completely before adolescence. Generally speaking, we advise parents that corporal discipline should only be applied in cases of willful disobedience or defiance of authority—never for mere childish irresponsibility.

And it should never be administered harshly, impulsively, or with the potential to cause physical harm. Along those lines, we caution parents who have a hard time controlling their temper to choose alternative forms of discipline.

There is never an excuse or an occasion to abuse a child. For parents who do choose to spank, the proper philosophy and approach is extremely important. Too begin with, as with all forms of correction, the concepts of punishment and discipline are absolute opposites.

On the other hand, discipline is motivated by love for the child, focuses on the future, and results in obedience and feelings of security. Be as flexible as you can, but be unyielding on the important things, especially issues of safety. When you feel you must "punish" your child, remember that, in his eyes, your disapproval or anger is the heaviest punishment of all. And any punishment you do mete out should be immediate, because a child this young can't think about later consequences, only what's happening right here and now.

So if he misbehaves in the morning, don't tell him he can't watch a video that night. But if he acts up in the video store and refuses to stop, you can pick him up and say "That's it, we're going now and we won't be able to get a video.

Most importantly, demonstrate with your own action the kind of behavior you want from him. If you make a mistake, don't be afraid to admit it and to tell him you're sorry. He'll be more likely to grow up into the kind of adult you're proud of. Hyman: Jossey-Bass. Shure, Pocket Books. D, with Joan Declaire: Simon and Schuster. Shure: Pocket Books. Kesey, Ed. Berkeley Publishing Group. CDC , Felitti and Anda, Family Research Laboratory.

Child Trends Databank. Attitudes Towards Spanking. University of Michigan Health System. Spanking out, talking in: Most parents opt to talk with misbehaving kids. Acquire the license to the best health content in the world. Should I spank my child? Spanking may seem like a direct and effective way to do that, but it delivers other messages you don't want to send: Fear.

Spanking teaches your child to fear you -- not to listen to you or respect you. He may also be humiliated and resentful, and retaliate by being uncooperative.

The result: You'll be less able to reason with and set effective limits for your child. Advertising on our site helps support our mission. We do not endorse non-Cleveland Clinic products or services. The American Academy of Pediatrics AAP recently issued a strong statement advising parents not to spank their children, based on a growing pile of studies showing that the disciplinary technique does more harm than good. Research over the last 20 years has demonstrated that spanking increases aggression in young children and is ineffective in changing their undesirable behavior, the AAP says.

Studies have also linked spanking to an increased risk of mental health disorders and impaired brain development. The AAP is an influential professional association that represents some 67, pediatricians across the country. In a poll , about half of parents under the age of 36 reported having spanked their own children. While spanking may create a sense of fear in the child in that moment, it will not improve behavior over the long term, experts say.

In fact, regular spanking normalizes the act of hitting and can lead to aggressive behavior that encourages continued conflict between the parent and child. List of Partners vendors. Spanking is a widely debated topic. Most experts advise against using corporal punishment, but some parents believe that spanking is an effective discipline strategy.

Other parents admit they have occasionally spanked their child—especially when they were feeling overly stressed. Whichever camp they belong to, all parents need to know and closely consider the potential consequences of physical punishment, including spanking. Sometimes, parents spank their children out of desperation. Without a consistent discipline strategy, it might feel like spanking is the best option. While spanking may alter behavior in the short-term, it rarely has a positive effect in the long term.

Studies have shown that spanking is ineffective and has detrimental consequences on child development. Parents may rely on spanking to "fix" behavior problems without trying alternative discipline strategies—or giving those options enough time to work.

Another common reason parents spank is out of exasperation, impulse, or anger. A parent who reacts out of frustration "I can't believe you just did that! If you don't know how else to discipline your child, spanking might become the first line of defense. While it might feel like a solution at the moment, spanking won't solve the problem or teach your child better behavior. Many parents later regret striking their children.

Spanking can also cause lasting damage to the parent-child relationship. Various cultural groups have historically held the belief that spanking is part of their upbringing and cultural background. However, the negative impact remains the same. Also, corporal punishment habits are the residual impact of colonialism that has been adopted by many cultural groups. There is some historical evidence of Black and Brown families being engaged with corporal punishment.

However, colonialism brought many of those strategies. In addition to being an inadequate solution to behavioral problems, spanking a child can actually create more problems.



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